Tuesday, September 21, 2010

There's a trend emerging here, I think. I DO actually like it here, cabbage juice and soviet architecture notwithstanding. My brothers coming soon, from France, and we'll sample some chocolate beer on the main square and eat zurek and pigdeons and do the whole polish thing. And I'll write about it, and it'll be ecstatically, orgasmically happy and endearing towards Poland. Something positive and cheerful coming soon!

soviet beauty





Could these be the ugliest apartment blocks in Poland? They're located in south Wroclaw, and obviously date to the soviet era. You have to wonder whether the designers were driven by strictly utilitarian principles to erect such monuments to ugliness, or whether soviet architecture was deliberately styled to invoke despair. There are several more of these buildings nearby, an unholy family of them. We went up in one when we were looking for a place. The lift had a cardboard door, and made a strange keening sound as it lurched disconsolately between floors, as if a cat was slowly being electrocuted to death on the roof. The room was spartan and souless; a young muscly guy with a gym bag was vacating it. It wasn't cheap either. It had one big thing in its favour, though, a great pizza place somewhere in those shops at the bottom.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Kapusta poison

If there was ever a contender for the grossest thing ever produced, this is it. Think sweaty sock juice extract, and you'll be getting something close.

It's cabbage juice. Not only cabbage juice, cabbage juice produced in an ecologically friendly way. Does this mean that regular normal cabbage juice might be less grevious?

Possibly.

It smells faintly of sour cabbage, which is another acquired taste. Maybe you're meant to cook with it; it's something akin to fish sauce, Polish style. Or you just need a lifetime of incessant cabbage consumption to be used to it.


Potent. There's a good polish word for this. And that is "blekh."

Afterword: Ewa said I was being excessively unkind and that it was my job to be an ambassador for Poland.  Thus i should only have nice things to say about cabbage. I was being a bit hyperbolic. But only a bit. This stuff is nasty, there's no escaping it. Prosze wybaczać, Ewy kochanie! ;)

Monday, September 13, 2010

"Why Poland?"

I've lost count of the number of times people have asked me, somewhat incredulously, "why Poland?!" Why did I choose Poland. It's a valid question, and my answer is that I didn't really choose Poland, it sort of happened to me, in the form of a girl named E. At this point they smile or laugh and start nodding their heads vigorously. It all makes sense now. A girl brought you to Poland! it's always the same! And it's true, I'd be being disingenuous if I said otherwise. However, there's no place I'd rather be. Poland is like a giant riddle dying to be solved, by me. I enjoy untangling Polish culture, love polish people, fell in love with Krakow, appreciate Wrocław, get a perverse enjoyment out of learning the language, and am just very happy to be here.

Sometimes when the conversation continues for a little while, it becomes clear that Australia has some sort of mythical paradise status in the eyes of some Poles, and another question arises as "why did you ever leave?" Living in Australia is like living on life support. It's a brand new country, and everything is, well, new, everything is very orderly and comfortable and familiar, and this is for some people, but I want to... expose myself to the world, if you will, experience different things, different cultures. With this said, Poland is the sort of country I would gravitate towards, and maybe I was fated to come here. In any case, I can never complain about things being too simple or straightforward again. And that is just fine.

Friday, September 3, 2010

If you want attention from your girlfriend, don't eat smoked mackeral. Or alternatively if you want a bit of space, rub some on your skin.